Vampires Anonymous Author:Jeffrey N. McMahan "I'm an experience that will take you to heaven," Stanley tells a prospective mark in what just might be the first-ever Gay Vampire Novel. — Stanley is only one of the gay vampires Andrew Lyall, himself a gay vampire, must put up with when attending Vampires Anonymous meetings. Andrew--who drinks three pitchers of margaritas at the drop of a snid... more »e remark--hates these meetings but goes along with his lover Pablo, who has been stricken with the call to abstinence. Pablo is undergoing a conversion experience, into becoming a non-blood-drinking vampire, an aspiration Andrew sneers at.
Why does Pablo get up at VA meetings and say, "Hello, my name is Pablo, and I'm a vampire"? Because he hates killing his victims--an act that sometimes blooms obsessively--and then beheading them to save them from eternity as a vampire like himself. The world is full of gay vampires, but these good folk are put upon by the bad Vampire Cops, Eddie and Steven, a team that hunts them down and drives wooden stakes through their hearts.
Mid-novel, Pablo himself is beheaded--by whom? And is it now too late to save Andrew, getting him in off the streets and amounting to something in VA? Grieving Andrew accuses his fellow fiends of murdering Pablo, and himself kills one of them, but then finds Pablo's friend Colin also murdered with a wooden stake. What's more, he befriends a four-year-old boy vampire--ah, Chaplin and The Kid--who will remain four through eternity. Will Andrew find the solutions to these murders at Ocean Village, the last words spoken by Colin? How will Andrew's sudden love affair with a human, Eddie the boy cop, end? And who is behind this insidious Vampires Anonymous, which means to stamp out vampirism? Can it be. . .the werewolves!. . .the vampires' greatest enemy? Quite strained, dumbly worked out and unconvincing on its own terms.« less