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If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation
If I Am Missing or Dead A Sister's Story of Love Murder and Liberation
Author: Janine Latus
In April 2002, Janine Latus's youngest sister, Amy, wrote a note and taped it to the inside of her desk drawer. Today Ron Ball and I are romantically involved, it read, but I fear I have placed myself at risk in a variety of ways. Based on his criminal past, writing this out just seems like the smart thing to do. If I am missing or dea...  more »That same spring Janine Latus was struggling to leave her marriage -- a marriage to a handsome and successful man. A marriage others emulated. A marriage in which she felt she could do nothing right and everything wrong. A marriage in which she felt afraid, controlled, inadequate, and trapped.Ten weeks later, Janine Latus had left her marriage. She was on a business trip to the East Coast, savoring her freedom, attending a work conference, when she received a call from her sister Jane asking if she'd heard from Amy. Immediately, Janine's blood ran cold. Amy was missing.Helicopters went up and search dogs went out. Coworkers and neighbors and family members plastered missing posters with Amy's picture across the county. It took more than two weeks to find Amy's body, wrapped in a tarpaulin and buried at a building site. It took nearly two years before her killer, her former boyfriend Ron Ball, was sentenced for her murder.Amy died in silent fear and pain. Haunted by this, Janine Latus turned her journalistic eye inward. How, she wondered, did two seemingly well-adjusted, successful women end up in strings of physically or emotionally abusive relationships with men? If I Am Missing or Dead is a heart-wrenching journey of discovery as Janine Latus traces the roots of her own -- and her sister's -- victimization with unflinching candor. This beautifully written memoir will move readers from the first to the last page. At once a confession, a call to break the cycle of abuse, and a deeply felt love letter to her baby sister, Amy Lynne Latus, If I Am Missing or Dead is an unforgettable read.
Info icon
ISBN-13: 9780743296533
ISBN-10: 0743296532
Publication Date: 4/17/2007
Pages: 320
Rating:
  • Currently 3.6/5 Stars.
 206

3.6 stars, based on 206 ratings
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Book Type: Hardcover
Other Versions: Paperback, Audio CD
Reviews: Member | Amazon | Write a Review

Top Member Book Reviews

RockStarGirl avatar reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 329 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 16
This was less about the murder of Amy Latus and more about the relationship of two sisters, both of whom are willing to put up with abusive relationships because of the dysfunctional childhood they shared. The majority of the book is about the author's own life....it is not until near the end of the book that her sister disappears. It is through her own experiences though, that she can sadly understand why it is that her sister never came to her for help. It is a sad book and a peek into the mind of those who are willing to put up with abuse from those they love.
reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 3 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 13
This book is so consuming from finish to end. I loved it!! I bought this from Barnes n nobles and finished it in 2 days.

In 2002,Janine Latus's younger sister Amy, wrote a note and pasted it to her desk in her office drawer. It was not until her body was found a week later that her family had for the first time of her troubled emotional and physical violence in her relationship that she was enduring. It is a heart wrenching, journey of discovery as Janine traces her own roots and her sister's victimization and unflinching candor. This memoir will move you, an hopefully play a part for all the women who have known or are in this situation and and break the cycle of abuse. One sister got out and one is now dead. Tragic!!
reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on
Helpful Score: 10
Let me start by saying that this was a tough book to read, yet I couldn't put it down (I read the book in just over 6 hours!). Janine Latus candidly shares her life story and her history of abuse. It starts with her father and his emotional abuse of Janine and her siblings and chronicals her relationships with men and the physical, mental/emotional, and sexual abuse she endures along the way. Her life mirrors that of her sister who also endures abuse in its' different forms. The latter part of the book delves into the death of her sister, Amy, at the hands of her abuser. Of the two, Janine is the lucky one.

Reading the back of the book is somewhat misleading in that the reader might think that the book is more about Amy's story. That's not the case. Amy's story is really only told in the last one-third of the book.

While this book is incredibly gut wrenching (I was crying while reading the last part of the book), there are moments of levity. And while this book is predominantly about abuse and all its' forms, this book is also about families and familial relationships. In those passages the reader sees that there are genuine bonds of love that hold the Latus family together through it all.

This is a book that everyone, especially women, should read. For men this book can show how comments, acts and gestures that may seem harmless can be forms of abuse. For women, this book is a really a gift. I believe that Ms. Latus wanted share her story so that all of us could remember how truly wonderful and amazing we are. While tragic, there was an underlying message of hope that shined through.

Although I have passed this book on to another PBS member, this book and it's message is one that will stay with me for a long time. It's simply unforgettable.
iluvlibros avatar reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 73 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 8
To be honest, my jury's still out on this book. There is no doubt that the author is a great writer. She really pulled you onto the emotional rollercoaster that the sisters were on. The book was heartwarming in the sense that it showed a deep, loving relationship between two sisters. But what these sisters endured was also shocking and heartwrenching. It's a tearjerker. Ultimately, the book left me frustrated and saddened at what the two sisters went through.
sfc95 avatar reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 686 more book reviews
Helpful Score: 8
This is a fabulous book. As a domestic violence counselor I do not think that I have ever read a better account of "life on the inside" as I did in this book. If you know someone who questions the validity of their relationship this is the book to hand them. I cannot sing the praises of this book enough, it is horrific, enlightening and informative at the same time. The author captured what women having been telling me for years, it is very important that battered women know that they are not alone and in this book they will learn that it is so much more prevalent than they ever imagined. It depicts the cycle of violence perfectly, don't miss this one!
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reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on
This was a great book, so touching.
reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 41 more book reviews
I have read a lot of true-first person accounts as part of my training, because I am the paralegal to the staff attorney for our local domestic violennce outreach. Its a topic I find fascinating, because even though I, myself, am a survivor of domestic violence, both towards me and earlier towards my mother, I never understand why its so simple to resort to violence. Aren't we civilized? Anyway, this is a really finely written accounting of one woman's journey into the world of domestic violence, and how her family strives for justice.
reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 26 more book reviews
This book was good, however it was more about the author Janine Latus, than her sister who was murdered. It was still a great book, I however thought it was going to something else prior to reading it.
geebetty4 avatar reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on
A good cautionary story: we can't expect our family to spill their deep dark secrets, such as an an abusive spouse. My take from this story was to keep listening to that little intuition that says "there's seething wrong here" and to keep giving your loved one chances to open up.
lynnjenk1113 avatar reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 6 more book reviews
Very good book. Majority of book concentrates on domestic abuse against author. Non the less, very good read.
reviewed If I Am Missing or Dead: A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation on + 4 more book reviews
Very gripping story...read it in a matter of two days..


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